Both men and women, who were exposed to sexually explicit material, thought they had more romantic alternatives. Not only did exposure to pornography increase people’s beliefs about their alternatives, but they were also more likely to cheat on their partners. Why? Viewing pornography may lead individuals to think that other people are both more attractive and accessible. Subsequently, people act on those beliefs. The key takeaway from the study:

“In sum, our studies suggest that sexually explicit material enhances perceptions of relationship alternatives which, in turn, increase the likelihood of intimate extradyadic behavior.”

The entire study can be found here.

Infidelity is like many other traumatic events.  It either brings couples closer together or it exposes serious problems that can’t be fixed.  Two new books on the topic explore what it takes to fix a relationship after infidelity has come to light.  A review of these books can be found here.

Most couples know what the rules are when it comes to interacting with others.  There are lines that romantic partners are not supposed to cross.  Yet, when it comes to online encounters, the rules are not so clear.  What counts as cheating or being too flirtatious online?  New research shows that flirting online can be just as damaging to a relationship as cheating in the real world.  The implications of this research are straightforward.  Couples should establish clear rules about the types of online activities that are acceptable.  Don’t let the ambiguous nature of online flirting cause real damage to your relationship.  Make the rules explicit and follow them.

If you wouldn’t do it face-to-face, you probably shouldn’t be doing it online either.

In many cases, cheating is not something people plan to do (see, why people cheat).  So, when people cheat on a partner, it creates a discrepancy between how people want to view themselves and the reality of the situation.  In order to reduce this stress, individuals often trivialize what they have done.  New experimental research tests this out.  In a hypothetical situation, cheaters, who were able to minimize their behavior by claiming “it didn’t mean anything”, felt better about themselves.

So, the next time a cheater says, “It didn’t mean anything” – it probably means a lot.  It most likely means that the cheater feels better about what has happened.

What is the purpose of oral sex?  Could it have evolved as a means of detecting infidelity?  After all, what better way to check on a mate’s fidelity than by doing a close up inspection where you can make use of more of your senses – smell, sight, and taste.  It sounds revolting, but new research is starting to explore how oral sex may function as an unconscious way of checking for infidelity.