Self-Deception, Love and Romance
"The truth that survives is simply the lie that is pleasantest to believe."-- H. L. Mencken
When it comes to love and romance, self-deception can be useful because the truth about our close relationships can be difficult to acknowledge.
Few people always want to know the truth or seek it out. In fact, many people actively deny the truth until they are forced to deal with it.
We rarely see the world as it really is. Our perception of the world is biased, our memories betray us, and our true motives can remain hidden.
For better or worse, we constantly convince ourselves of things that are not true. We kid ourselves about the most basic things in life: Who we are and what is going on around us.
Most of the time we lie to ourselves in order to maintain a sense of control. After all, no one likes feeling vulnerable or helpless.
All of us experience the world through various filters—most of which are designed to make life more bearable.
In fact, it would be possible to devote an entire website to the topic of self-deception and social interaction. But for our purposes, we will highlight just a few of the biases that play a role in our romantic relationships.
To start with, please take a look at the following examples. These perceptual tricks illustrate how we don’t always experience the world as it really is.
Or skip the examples and go directly to the information about self-deception...
- selective attention
- imposing beliefs on things we see
- discounting evidence which contradicts our beliefs
- advantages of self deception
- disadvantages of self deception
- more perception tricks