Snooping and Spying Secrets

Snooping reveals the truth

I checked his phone and know he’s lying.

Separated and snooping on my wife

I’ve been married for 10 years and found out 8 months ago that she’d been harboring feelings towards an old flame for nearly 3 years. 8 months ago was also when she asked for a separation. We still live together and our 4 small kids don’t know what’s going on, but I’ve snooped on her phone, journals and facebook account on and off for the duration of the separation. I’ve found some hurtful things where she talks about flirting with guys to her friends, inappropriate texts with the old flame and a few other minor ones. She’s been out of town for some training for 2 months and this also happens to be where the old flame is at. I’ve become obsessed with checking her phone history, facebook and iphone location constantly throughout the day. She’s 400 miles away and I have no way to completely verify the evidence I’ve compiled, but it’s literally killing me all day every day by snooping. I’m distracted and not spending quality time with my kids. It gives me a short temper with them as well when I’m seeing things I don’t like. I understand that we’re separated and she’s already filed paperwork for a divorce, but I’m trying to honor my vows. I’m still in love with her, but I can’t seem to jump this hurdle to stop making assumptions, being preoccupied with my fears of what could be happening and not accepting the reality that she has said she’s done with the marriage.

Addicted to snooping on my wife

I had suspicions that my wife was keeping something from me and may have become bored with our marriage. I am away with work a lot. We have young children and she finds being a stay-at-home mother very frustrating. She is a good-looking, attractive, extroverted person who is very good at connecting with people. She has always told me that she likes having male friends as she likes the variety of conversation, as in not all about kids, laundry etc!! I checked her phone and Facebook Instant Messaging page and found correspondence with two different men which really hurt me. These were not sexual in nature but were much more intimate than I would have liked. I confronted her about the situation and, of course, she initially went crazy that I had snooped. However, I think she understood the depths of my anxiety and assured me that she has not been unfaithful. I believe her that she has not been physically unfaithful but am concerned at the level of emotional connection with one of them in particular. The other guy has the hots for her for sure but I do not see him as any sort of threat to me. While I believe her that she is just friends with these two guys, I have become addicted to checking her phone whenever I can. I know the code for her phone but not her Facebook page – if I did I am sure I would check that too. I have also followed her on a couple of occasions recently (never found anything – she did exactly what she said she was doing on each occasion). I desperately want to get on with our life but am unable to stop this madness. If I am caught, my marriage could well be over. I know that there is nothing to this other than friendship but I can’t stop snooping. I keep justifying it to myself by saying that I am just looking for reassurance that she is telling the truth. Please help me to stop and to get over this awful phase of my once happy life!!

Checked my husband’s phone

I got curious after a woman I didn’t know kept calling my husband over the weekend. We have a long distance marriage. When he was asleep, I checked his text messages for the first time and was devastated. There were sexual text messages from two different woman. When I confronted about one of them, he said I was wrong for checking, and he turned it on me. Apparently, saying "that was just a friendly diddle" and I need a massage is code word for I need drugs. I didn’t buy it, because the other text messages were to some girl and they were sexual in nature, and specifically using the words.. If I’m going to cheat.. it better be good. So how do I confront him a second time, when he denied the first? I have been holding this secret for almost 2 years.. and he doesn’t know why I am a jealous wife.. Not telling the truth I know is killing me inside. Thank you.

cannot stop snooping

I’ve been snooping ALL of my girlfriends since I was 16 years old. I am now 27. The first time I snooped was with my mother’s ICQ account, where I found out she was cheating my father with another man. I did not tell my father, but soon enough they divorced. Since then, I’ve had 5 serious relationships, in which I used keylogging software to find out my girlfriends’ passwords. Lately, I’ve been getting worse. I’ve never been more in love that with the woman I am now. But, it seems that I am snooping more than ever. I’ve been hacking into her Facebook, email, skype and documents in her computer. I’ve also been snooping around her personal belongings such as diaries, old photos and bag of sex goodies. A part of me wants to tell her, but another part of me wants to shut the hell up, stop and continue with my life.

Constantly invading my boyfriend’s privacy

I am a horrible girlfriend. I have snooped in my boyfriend’s phone, because I thought he was cheating and I busted him. But, I can’t seem to let it go... I have stayed up late and snooped thru his phone – looked at pictures, deleted some that he had of her and him – even tho they were password protected I hacked in and deleted them. I find myself being overly sensitive and extremely jealous now- its so not me. He wants to work on our relationship but I just cant get over it every time we are argue I throw it in his face and then I regret it – we are supposed to be starting fresh -- I even put a monitoring device on his phone – only for 3 months but I am in month 2 – I know he s still not contacting her but its making me crazy.

Regret snooping on my girlfriend

I got my on-again, off-again girlfriend’s password to her phone about a year ago. Things have been going well over the past few months but I recently found out she’s still on a dating site and has been calling and texting guys who she then hangs out with at bars or communicates with via Facebook. I want to confront her about this but can’t know what I know without fessing up to the snooping. I wish I hadn’t looked in the first place, but is ignorance really bliss or do I have a legitimate reason to move on and find someone new?

Snooping on my lover

I check my lover’s social network pages daily.

Obsessing on someone I once dated

I sometimes spy on my former friend. We had a short lived, emotionally charged relationship and I am still reeling from it. He has moved on with his life, and is doing well, yet I am languishing in his rejection of me. I have a lot of unresolved feelings and I have missed all opportunities to share them with him so I am hurt all of the time. I can’t believe how angry I am. I had to deactivate from Facebook because his posts made me cry, but I still check his Twitter and his roommates Twitter to see what he is doing. He cut me out completely of his life, and I still feel there is something missing in my life because I am not apart of things. I think i hate him, and I am aware that he wants nothing to do with me, yet I still snoop. I am not sure where this fixation is coming from. It causes me a lot of anxiety to act on my compulsions. I hate that I care about someone who does not care about me. I do not even feel satisfied when i learn what he is up to, in fact I feel worse.

Thinking about ending a relationship

He has a beautiful female friend that lives many states away. He texts her daily and they talk almost every other day. He says they are just friends but he erases her calls and texts. I know all this from checking our cell phone account that we share. He never talks to her around me. They call each other on their lunch breaks or on their way home from work. I’ve seen inappropriate texts to each other and it makes me feel so sad inside and I cry often about it. When I’ve confronted him about it, he says that I shouldn’t snoop then and he gets mad at me. Then I feel horrible for snooping, but I can’t stop!

I’ve been so close to ending it because of this. I’m a tortured soul. Other than this, our relationship is perfect. Is it so bad to want to be his one and only?