Infidelity Secrets

Keep acting out sexually because I am insecure

I was very young when I was abused mentally and physically by a boyfriend for a lengthy period of time. The result was an extreme insecurity complex, and a reliance on sex and sexual activity to make me feel good about myself. I cheated when I was 17, my boyfriend left me. I went on a rampage, sleeping with people to feel better about myself and having 3 week long pseudo-relationships just to feel like I mattered. Then I met another at 18, two months into my freshman year at college, and we fell in love. None of my issues were fixed, none of my problems. I just threw a blanket over them. Then, senior year came and he was gone. I’ve cheated. A few times. I can’t stop I just lose myself and it’s like I’m not deciding my actions anymore. I regret it every time, and it’s eating away at me, but I have to make him happy I have to be the best I can be for him because he deserves that. He deserves to be the happiest man alive. I hope that I can get through this. I could never tell him, but I hope it never comes out. I pray to God. Don’t ever do this to yourself, it’s horrible to deal with.

Did not tell the complete truth about my cheating

i cheated on my partner. We have been together for 10 years. She found out about my affair and i cam clean about everything, aside from the number of encounters i had sex with the other woman. It is a lot more than I told her. Is this detail going to help at all? Cheating is cheating, whats the difference if I did it 1 time or 50 times? Why do I feel bad for not telling her the true number of times (I never counted) so I don’t know, but it was more than 3 times...

Afraid of what I might do if my fiance cheated

I think my fiance has cheated on me but she knows that if i found out id snap and make her dig her own grave and put her there at her final resting place. I’d definitely be the main target of her investigation but it would be a crime of passion not premeditated. I would be prepared for the consequences but would feel lost and without her forever regretting what i had done. She knows I’m an educated, smart man who has a bright future ahead and our relationship is 6 years strong. I think because I have dedicated so much time, effort, and financial backing, and sacrifices for this woman the above described outcome would be the chosen path. Not something im proud of but just something I feel strongly about. Keep in mind I am not abusive verbally or physically and she can attest to this. However, i told her that if i caught her going outside of our relationship that i dont know what i would do. And that was 5 years ago said, and she’s had plenty of time to contemplate moving on without me without consequence.

I already have my masters degree and she is finishing up hers doing an internship in Africa now and I exposed a possible infidelity while she was at her grad school hours away last December (before she went to Africa this past august)...I found a few text messages from the same name as a friend of mine when I went to visit her at her school. The text message basically didn’t give a complied consent that she had screwed someone but it definitely raised an eyebrow and i confronted her and called out the guy prematurely which was no good on my part because i almost made her get in the car and drive hours with me so she could see this guy in pain... who had taunted me over HER phone. Turns out it was a guy with the same first name as my friend but a totally different phone #. I know it was part negative attention on her part but i want to know if she crossed the line or not. Having sex with hotter girls has crossed my mind but doesn’t fill a void with my relationship problems with her. Id need closure with her before I slept with another woman. And even then i couldn’t replicate what we had or will have in the future. This is my only demon. I’m drug free!

My cheating is killing me inside

I cheated. It is killing me and she comes home tomorrow. If she leaves I am out on the street and divorced. If she stays and I tell I deal with hostility and sadness forever.

If I hide it, she stays happy. I will be miserable but I deserve it.

Having an affair that will not end

I’ve started having an affair with a married man I work with and I haven’t told a single person. So far we haven’t had sex but we’re working up to that. I know he wants to have sex but he’s so afraid someone will find out so we don’t get a chance to be alone often. We’re "sexting" every day at work and most every night. I’m really jealous of his wife and hate hearing him talk about her. I hate going through the weekends wondering what he’s doing with her or if he’s having sex with her because I know he still does. I feel like we go through the weeks with me getting him all excited then he goes home to have sex with his wife. I do all the work and she gets the benefit. I’m going through a divorce so I go home by myself, ending up sexually frustrated. His wife is very "prudish" (his word to describe her) and though he’s tried to spice things up, she’s just not into it at all. He hasn’t had oral sex in 12 years! That’s where I come in, giving him an outlet for that side of himself. He also says he feels emasculated because she is very controlling and doesn’t trust him to handle things. So we’ve formed a strong emotional attachment because I’m encouraging to him and make him feel like a real man. At the end of the day, I know we need to stop what we’re doing before it goes any further but when we try we miss each other’s company so it keeps going on.

Friends with benefits

I have had a sexual relationship like a FWB for over two and a half years. I also have had a romantic and sexual relationship with the man I am deeply in love with. I could never bear to tell him the truth, and I could not bear to let go of my friend.

Cheated on my husband while he was deployed

I committed the worst sin against my relationship I could have—I cheated on my husband while he was deployed. I was so worried about him and depressed... I went out one night and got really drunk. I didn’t have my phone with me. I was too drunk to drive and a soldier offered me a ride home. I wound up at his house and we had sex. It was awful and I don’t think that I really knew what I was doing. That was several months ago, but as time goes on I feel worse and worse. I want to tell my husband so badly—I don’t like this space between us, but I know that it will only hurt him. With no risk of STDs (having been tested) why should I destroy him and our marriage because I was stupid? I hate myself so much. I wish I could go back and change things. I wish I would have had my phone so I could have called a friend that night. I love my husband so much—I don’t deserve him.

Cheated on my boyfriend and I regret it

I cheated on my boyfriend.. With one of his best friends. I can’t tell anyone I know, even my best friends. I think they would all hate me for it.. & who wouldn’t? I cheated on a good guy, with a guy that I’ve been waiting around for, for the last couple of years. I need some advice and I just don’t know what to do anymore..!?! :(

Feeling guilty about cheating on my girlfriend

I cheated on my girlfriend of 7 or so months. We broke up as I was talking to the girl. After a few weeks we got back together. She was devastated just at the fact that I left and cheated. I lied and said I didn’t have sex with the girl to save our relationship. We had sex one time with a condom. I think I only did it for the excitement and after it wore off, I realized what I had done. Its been almost a year now and its still hidden and I’ve been faithful.

I feel guilty, selfish, and also like I’m doing a good service to her. I wish I had never done it (don’t we all), but I’m living with it for the rest of my life. Maybe I’ll tell her after years have passed, or maybe never.

See you in hell. I know god forgives but...keeping a lie about infidelity into marriage until death?

My cheating has left me little place to turn

My situation is so inexplicably complicated.

My wife and I have separated, and I have been seeing another woman. I’ve known her for a few years, but we only recently acted on our feelings. We are crazy about each other, and I feel more in love and more connected to her than ever in my life. She is married with kids. And I’m a friend of the family. Her husband is somewhat abusive and has a temper, and she plans to leave him. He recently found out about our relationship, and confronted both of us. We denied everything. I’m not proud of that. I hate lying. And sometimes I feel enormous guilt, but my feelings for her are so strong and so real. We just feel "right."

Yesterday I discovered that she’s been lying to me about a coworker. This coworker has been pursuing her for the last couple weeks, and she told me that he is bothering her and won’t leave her alone. I advised her to report the creep to HR. However, I discovered that she’s been secretly texting HIM, and even sent him a photo of her breast. It absolutely broke my heart. I confronted her, and she fell to pieces. She admits it was wrong, says she is sorry, and says she’ll do anything to make US work. Says she wants me and only me. I believe her, but I don’t know if I can be with her, after all the deception.

Worst part is, i can’t vent or talk to anybody about it, because she is married, and I wouldn’t burden my friends with that kind of secret. This is the worst day ever.