All Secrets Revealed by Date

Cheated on my boyfriend yesterday

Monday, 11 July 2016
Infidelity

I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years I cheated on him yesterday. I love him, and I know it was an isolated mistake. It doesn’t feel right to confess and transfer my guilt into his pain, knowing it will never ever happen again. He loves me with all of himself, and I can’t break him. I need to start living my life the way he sees me, with grace and gratitude for everything he’s given me. This does feel very cathartic, and I’m glad I have somewhere to write this out.

Sent her sexual diary entries

Monday, 11 July 2016
Made a Mistake

I sent sexual diary entries from seven years ago to my ex, who is now a friend. The entries were written about her. I am engaged to someone else. I feel shitty.

Learned through my mistakes and keeping it to myself for now

Saturday, 14 May 2016
Relationship Issues

I am mother of a young child, married to a wonderful man, and I had an affair. For some reason, I thought this other guy, who is also married with children, was my soul mate. For about 10 months we wrote and chatted every day, saw each other a few times a week, arranged to meet publicly, and also met secretly. We had sex a handful of times, and we were convinced that we were in love. I still don’t know if that’s true. I honestly don’t know quite what that means anymore. Things started to fall apart when he started talking about leaving our spouses so that we could be together—he and his wife were on the verge of filing—and I told him not to ask me to leave my husband, that if he wanted to get a divorce then it had to be for him, not for me. So he backpedaled, and the next five months were spent with him putting various rules and boundaries in place, and me begging for bits and scraps of anything I could get of the adoration he used to show me, which I had grown addicted to. One day in June something snapped and I was tired enough of being caught on his hook and put in my place that I cut the line, told him the relationship was toxic, and informed him that I would not be speaking to him anymore. It was hard because there were still instances where we were forced to work together, but I avoided speaking to him almost entirely, with a few conversational relapses here and there. That was one year ago. But although things have much improved in all areas of my life since that time, it has been a hard year, and it has been difficult to heal because even though it is over, it is always running through my mind. I regret every aspect of my relationship with this person, except, strangely, for the pain and the lessons it taught me. This experience has forced me to face the lack of self-love and self-respect that made me vulnerable to this guy’s advances the first place. I’ve begun to look at life and love in a whole new way, a way that finally has the semblance of something healthy and whole. It has given me a new appreciation for my marriage and I feel more in love with my husband than ever. But it kills me that there is this secret between us, this barrier to intimacy. But I do not want to put him through the pain of knowing if I can possibly help it. Or maybe I’m just too scared to lose him, especially now that I’m pregnant with our second child. I just want us to move on with our life. He told me last weekend that he loves our life, that he’s so happy. After everything I’ve done to put this family at risk, and after all the work I’ve put into reflecting on myself and my values to make sure this never, ever happens again, I just can’t bear to deny him (and us) the happiness he deserves simply because I need to get a secret off my chest. However, I do, which is why I’m writing here. Maybe one day I will have the strength and courage to tell him, no matter what the outcome. But for now, this secret is mine to bear, my problem, my punishment for a colossal mistake. I’d like to send my love out to all of you out there who have wronged or been wronged—may we all find grace and forgiveness and peace in our hearts.

My affair helped me realize who I am

Saturday, 14 May 2016
Infidelity

I have been having a highly illicit sexual affair with a married man for 5 months. I am married as well. I have realized a few things recently 1) I’m not happy in my relationship anymore 2) I ended my affair amicably last week 3) I am just pretending to be someone I’m not and lastly 4) I am not interested in repairing my marriage. I’ll be moving out soon.

Messed around with my ex

Saturday, 14 May 2016
Relationship Issues

I’m huge on telling the truth because I’ve been lied to so much in the past by others, which is why this situation makes me feel awful about myself. At this time I was in a relationship with a new guy for only a month and a half. I made plans to hang out with an ex and the intentions were true, just to drink and hang out, completely platonic. We ended up getting super drunk and falling back into old habits, cuddling, playing around. We skinny-dipped in a hot tub, but it wasn’t meant to be sexual, it was just meant to be goofy and spontaneous. However, the temptation was there, and feelings of nostalgia surfaced. We came close to kissing but I told him I couldn’t do this because I knew there was no way I could live with the guilt if I had cheated. However, it still wasn’t the most honest thing to do while in a relationship with someone else. I told my current boyfriend half the truth -- that my ex tried kissing me but I turned it down. I’ve been with this guy for about five months now and things are getting serious and going great. Telling him would crush him and ruin everything we have but the guilt is killing me.

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