Past Comments – My boyfriend received an inappropriate picture

This is only the beginning
written by Guest, 15 March, 2007

I too found a picture (actually 3 of them) fully nude pictures that my bf (ex) had received over instant messenger. I confronted him after holding it in for 4 weeks. His explanation was that the girl wanted to be in the same profession as him. I told him the nature of their conversation should never have been anything that would warrant her sending him pictures. He said she was talking about how happy she was in her relationship and how her bf made her so happy and how he took pictures of her. So why was she sending another guy these pictures??? Well I ended up leaving in tears and when I got home I demanded he give me his password so I could at least try to confirm. At first he wouldn’t give it to me and was very upset that I was going to end our relationship over something like this. Anyway, finally got his password and what did I find?? Over 200 girls on his contact list and the one girl I decided to chat with because she had the same name as me had no idea he had a girlfriend and after begging and pleading her to tell me what she said ‘was not her place to tell’ she had been sleeping with him for the past 2 years. So there is ALWAYS more to the story and if you dig deeper you will find the proof you need although him cheating on me with a different girl than who he received the pictures from NEVER crossed my mind. Guys will deny deny deny to the day they die until you have solid proof that they can no longer hide from. Even then they will make excuses. If you are snooping, you have some intuitions about him. TRUST them, they happen for a reason. If you were walking down the street and felt like you were being followed and your safety was a concern you would listen.

written by Kaia, 31 October, 2007

Snoop for security but don’t get caught and don’t ever let on otherwise you will break the trust.

written by Khalelah, 13 April, 2010

Hello, I suspect that my bf is cheating with his ex and maybe someone else. I have been feeling real bad and sometimes sick because I knew something wasn’t right. I told my bf one time that I didn’t feel comfortable with him being friends with his ex, but he assure me that there was nothing going on and that I can trust him. I was snooping through his phone because I wanted the assurance that my baby would never hurt me, especially lie to me about his ex. There was pics in his phone of his ex (nude) posing for him. I wanted to die. It felt like my heart was about to stop and I was hoping that it would. I tried to talk to him, but he could only see my flaws. Then tell me that he couldn’t believe that I would turn around and find faults to blame him because I’m miserable and be depressed(which I do be down and depressed sometimes). I know that I’m not perfect and I have shut him out when I go through my stages of feeling stressed and sometimes depressed. I am guilty. It still doesn’t justify why he would lie to me about not sleeping with his ex. I want to talk to her, not to start a fight(that’s not my style)to get an understanding as to why.
Why would he lie. When I met him I was getting over a horrible marriage and a terrible divorce. The other parts of our relationship are good and worth fighting for. I’m so scared of being hurt and I have just as much pain trying to get over it than having to deal with it. Some one please help me. Should I tell him where I got the proof from and deal with the consequences, or should I work it out and move on??

written by M.R.B., 26 May, 2010

Khalelah,

I’m so sorry to hear that....I’ve been there before. I just recently broke up with my ex-boyfriend whom I really didn’t trust about two months ago. After the break-up he and I maintained contact with each other. He would tell me that he missed me in which I was considering giving him another chance to work things out until I had this disturbing dream about him and another female. Not to mention I looked on his myspace page and saw that he had made a very inappropriate comment to some girl’s pic when he and I were dating each other. Of course, I confronted him about it and he couldn’t really say anything,but that he was done with me. All I wanted was an apology because what he did really hurt me. I’m better off without him. Honestly, you should just move on because what your ex-boyfriend did to you was VERY DISRESPECTFUL and it leaves a question in your mind, "So what else have you been doing?" I know it’s easier said than done, but believe me you are better off on your own so that you and the right person can be together. I wish you luck!

written by justpie, 01 November, 2010

I found out about many pictures my boyfriend hid on his computer, email, and even printed out. I first found the pictures he printed of girls on MySpace ( mutual friends of ours) stashed away in his backpack while getting laundry. This was two years ago, we have been dating for three. I was pretty taken back by this and chose to not confront him right away, to wait it out and see if anything else came up. I loved him so much, I guess I was in denial. Later on, we exchanged passwords to email accounts and such to prove love and trust..I guess..now was my chance to find out if there was more and sure and sure enough lots of pictures sent to his email ( himself) of mutual girlfriends, even his best friend’s fiance! I was petrified, broke down and finally confronted him. He denied everything at first, then when I threatened to tell the girls in the pictures what he was doing he admitted it. He apologized and said he would delete everything, that he’ll change, and that he knows what he’d done was wrong...I accepted his apology but was still very upset, so I took some ‘me’ time to figure things out. It really hurt me he saved pics of our friends, ppl we see and hung out with regularly.
A month later we got back together, I loved him and he missed me. I thought things would be different, and as far as I could tell he had changed. The feelings of deceit never really left me, I was still on guard but I truly wanted things to get better. They were good for a couple months.

written by justpie, 01 November, 2010

--long story short, since then things have not gotten better. He isn’t open with me and I’m always suspicious if he’s lying or telling the truth. A small piece of my heart wants and hopes things will get better and give him the benefit of the doubt, but my gut feeling always proves right in the end. He changed his passwords and hides his phone..I haven’t changed mine and let him see anything he wants. I have nothing to hide. I want out of this mess because it won’t get better, he doesn’t want to make it better. Please give some insight on why he keeps pulling me back and doesn’t want to change. What can I do to make a fresh break? This relationship has made me feel inadequate, ugly, and given me low self esteem. This is not who I am.

written by laly, 16 March, 2012

I found naked photo shoots of some girl in my boyfriend computer and I can believe he does this with some other girl what he does with me!!! I will surely throw it in his face. If I will do something like this he will surely kill me for that I just feel really bitter and upset. But maybe that it just normal for all the guys...