Ran across pictures of him on social media with his ex-wife

Last year, I went on a solo vacation and I became acquainted with a tour guide. We spent my entire vacation together and I have been back to visit him a few times.

We have an amazing time together, and even when we are apart, knowing him has had a positive impact on my life, until yesterday. He has a daughter and he previously told me that he is no longer in a relationship with his daughter’s mother.

However, I came across photos on social media that seem to imply differently. I am scheduled to visit him again in January, and I don’t know what to do. My initial reaction was to not go anymore. But then I felt I should ask him. Could I be wrong? He has said that he still communicates and provides for this woman, as he should. So could I be misinterpreting the photos?

I don’t know how to handle this moving forward.

Response:

Share your feelings with him. Tell him you are confused and concerned. Don’t make accusations—just share how you feel when you came across the pictures. Watch how he responds. Does he try to understand your point of view?

If he dismisses your concerns, or if he gets defensive or testy, then that is something to take note of—a red flag. Ideally, you want him to listen to your feelings and then tell his side of the story—whatever that may be.

Relationships are built on trust and understanding. Share your feelings with him and hopefully he will listen and share his feelings with you. By talking about issues such as the one your experiencing now, couples can grow closer together or further apart. Conversations like this can be very revealing.

Hope that helps.

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