Past Comments – My discomfort with intimacy is pushing my husband away

written by Donnyb, 20 July, 2007

Here is the other side. Although I have lost a lot of trust in my wife, I would forever forgive her if she had your desire. Hopefully you will be able to read my questions from a husband’s perspective from a wife that has ended intimacy, but is not willing to try and fix the marriage. I will gladly share my story with you in another way if you want.

written by JackandJill, 09 September, 2007

I know how you feel, I have endured 6 years of a relationship where my husband has actually told me that he never felt sparks for me. I gave him permission to lie to me just to ease the pain of what he said, big mistake, now I never believe anything he says. the list goes on and on. I’ve tried to be supportive of him but he makes it very difficult to even survive anymore.

written by Lynndie, 26 September, 2007

Sorry to hear about that. It may be too little, too late. I have been going through somewhat a similar situation with my boyfriend of 9 years. Over the past 7 years, he has slowly become more distant and less affectionate. Sex is at a minimum and there is no spark left in me anymore. I have tried to talk w/him and he says he had issues about touch w/ ex wife refusing him. But that was 12 years ago! Though I have never refused him, this is a huge problem. Everyday I want to leave and find affectionate, caring love. I am scared to leave though. If you want to REALLY make this work... YOU have to let go of your past! and work on your present!! It is obvious that your HUSBAND has TRIED. THAT is worth EVERYTHING! PUT DOWN YOUR GUARD AND GO AFTER HIM... WITH ALL YOUR HEART. IT WON’T BE EASY, but if you love him it is worth the effort. BEST of LUCK!

written by confused543210, 21 July, 2009

I am in a familiar situation with my wife. She lies a lot and about everything.... even for a traffic ticket. She has mentioned that she does not want to be touched by anyone but she purchased a toy to meet her needs... go figure... I found her toy and told her that I thought you didn’t have a sex drive and she responded that it would be better than being out there looking for it from someone else... but I said you don’t want to be touch so why would you even think that it’s better than looking for it... Again, I know she is lying about not wanting for anyone to touch her. We are currently separated and she doing everything to ruin me financially and she want a peaceful resolution... another lie apparently... She says that she loves me but does not like the married life and that is not for her. Then she says she does not know what she wants anymore... Her car got repossessed, which under my name for non-payment and was not paying the mortgage either and fearing the home was going to foreclosed I stop paying Child support to pay for the mortgage, of course in consultation with my lawyer. My question is why would a wife do this and still say she love me... again... I think she is lying hence the confusion... The other thing is why the hell do I still thinking of making this work after she has done all this stuff... BTW we have been married for 17 years thinking back I have noticed our marriage started going down 3 years ago and I kick myself for not seeing it earlier!!! Gut instincts dictate she might be having an affair and I have confronted her asking if there someone else in the picture and she says NO... but I do not believe her due to all the lies she has done to me...

written by stupidforbelievinghim, 23 September, 2011

I feel that emotionally I am shot to pieces.