My father cheated and I’m not sure if I should tell my siblings

About 15 years ago my father cheated on my mother. The truth has only just come out now and my mother is quite devastated. I have three other sisters who live in Dallas and have no idea about what is going on at home and I know that the minute my sisters find out they are going to be devastated. My mother, father, and I have agreed to work things out and pretend like nothing has happened whenever they come over but a part of me feels as though they have a right to know the truth. But I don't know; I feel as though the truth will only bring pain to my sisters, should I tell them?

Response:

All relationships are complicated. All relationships have their ups and downs. The true test of a relationship is not how happy couples are when things are going great. The true test of love is having the strength to work through problems when they arise. That means coming together as a couple and working with a partner when trust is damaged and things seem bleak. This process of working through difficult times is best handled in the privacy of a relationship. While other people may have good intentions and want to be helpful, their advice and support often makes difficult situations more complicated to resolve. Third parties often have their own agendas, which don’t necessarily align with the people they are trying to help.

Our best advice is to honor your parents’ request. If your parents want your siblings involvement and advice, that is their decision to make. If you are having trouble coping with what you’ve learned, discuss your feelings with someone who isn’t directly involved in your family life and can help you talk through your concerns.

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