How do I know if I’m a pathological or compulsive liar

How can I tell if I am a pathological liar, a compulsive liar, or neither?

My lying has destroyed my relationship. How do I know if it is beyond repair?

How can I know if I need professional help, or if just realization of the problem will solve it?

I never realized before how much I was lying until confronted with the truth. I am afraid to know if I have a mental disease, or, if I am just simply afraid to tell the truth because of my strict childhood which taught me to hide things.

I am trying to change.


Great questions…

To begin with, the distinction between pathological and compulsive lying is more of a lay distinction—not a diagnosis that is made. But with that said, pathological lying is often associated with more manipulative behavior—intentionally lying to get one’s way—while compulsive lying is more habitual in nature (see types of lying).

But, if you think you may have a problem with compulsive lying, try our online quiz. You can see how your behavior compares with others (see compulsive lying quiz).

However, if lying has destroyed a close relationship, then it is something that needs to be addressed.

And while awareness of any problem is always useful, awareness alone may not be enough to fix compulsive lying. In many cases, compulsive lying is rooted in an underlying personality disorder, which often requires counseling in order to bring about lasting change (see mental health matters).

Given the stakes involved, talking to a counselor is typically the wisest course of action. Trying to figure this out on your own can be very confusing and it is less likely to result in success.

Finally, if your partner will forgive you depends on many factors:

  • the severity of the lies that were told
  • your level of remorse
  • your ability to change
  • and your partner’s other romantic options

But without trust, relationships simply do not last the test of time.

 my compulsive lying

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