Relationships, Infidelity and Deception Blog

Women Reveal while Men Conceal

By Truth About Deception

New research shows that there are sex differences when it comes to cheating. Specifically, when cheating on a partner women are more likely to tell the other person that they are in a relationship than are men.

In short, women are more likely to reveal the truth about their relational status when cheating while men are more likely to conceal their relational status.

It’s assumed that women have an easier time cheating when the other person knows that there won’t be any commitment, while men are less successful at cheating when they make it clear that it’s a no strings attached situation.

Source: Hughes, S. M., & Harrison, M. A. (2018). Women reveal, men conceal: Current relationship disclosure when seeking an extrapair partner. Evolutionary Behavioral Sciences. Forthcoming – link to article.


Are Republicans more Sexually Deviant than Democrats?

By Truth About Deception

While conservatives hold more negative views toward pornography, same-sex relationships, and premarital sex, do more traditional views about sexuality influence Republicans’ actual behavior?

New research, based on a data breach by the adultery website, Ashley Madison, reveals that Democrats are least likely to use Ashley Madison while Libertarians were the most likely to do so. Republicans and other voting groups (Independents, and Greens) fell somewhere in-between.

The researchers note that it is possible “that many people endorse conservative sexual attitudes strategically, rather than out of earnest belief.” It’s very similar to research showing that homophobic men tend to be turned on by gay-male pornography.

Sometimes people doth protest too much.


Arfer, K. B., & Jones, J. J. (2018). American political-party affiliation as a predictor of usage of an adultery website. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 1-9. Link to research.

Adams, H. E., Wright, L. W., & Lohr, B. A. (1996). Is homophobia associated with homosexual arousal?. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 105(3), 440-445.

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The Voice of a Cheater

By Truth About Deception

New research shows that the sound of a person’s voice alone can help reveal if a person has cheated on a partner.

In this research, both men and women simply had their voices recorded while counting from 1 to 10. Half of the speakers had cheated on a partner while the other half had not. Other participants were asked to rate the voices and evaluate whether the person speaking engaged in some type of infidelity. The participants were able to more accurately identify cheaters by simply listening to the sound of a person’s voice. The research took into account a wide range of factors that may have influenced the results such as a speaker’s attractiveness, body composition, and weight. It’s not clear exactly how listeners made their judgements — it’s not clear what aspects of a person’s voice reveal the tendency to cheat. The research simply shows that the tendency to engage in infidelity is somehow conveyed through the sound of a person’s everyday voice.

Source: Hughes, S. M., & Harrison, M. A. (2017). Your Cheatin’ Voice Will Tell on You: Detection of Past Infidelity from Voice. Evolutionary psychology, 15(2), 1-12.


Infidelity, Here and Now

By Truth About Deception

New research highlights the latest trends in patterns of infidelity. Here are some of the more interesting findings:

  • People are more likely to cheat during the summer months
  • At a minimum, it’s estimated that cheating happens in 20-25% of marriages
  • Rates of infidelity are increasing the fastest among older men (thanks, Viagra).
  • Infidelity is the number one reason for divorce
  • Cheating is more likely for individuals who have a dismissing or anxious style of attachment
  • Growing up in a house where infidelity occurred increases one’s odds of cheating
  • Living together before getting married is linked to increased infidelity
  • More opportunities to meet people at work increases the likelihood of cheating

Source: Fincham, F. D., & May, R. W. (2017). Infidelity in romantic relationships. Current Opinion in Psychology, 13, 70-74.

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Conflict and Attachment

By Truth About Deception

Couples don’t always see eye-to-eye. Conflict is certain to arise in every romantic relationship.

What matters the most is how couples approach and deal with conflict. Research consistently shows that one’s attachment style greatly influences how couples work through disagreements.

Partners with an anxious style of attachment are likely to:

  • Experience more frequent and intense conflict in their relationships
  • Blame their partners for disputes
  • Engage in a more controlling style of communication (make more demands, threats, and use manipulation).
  • Have difficulty letting go of issues

Partners with a dismissing style of attachment are likely to:

  • Downplay the importance and frequency of conflict in their relationships
  • Distance themselves from their partners
  • Withdrawal from conversations, limit their involvement, and curtail the discussion
  • Try to keep their feelings to themselves

Given what anxious and dismissing individuals bring to the table in terms of their approach to conflict, you can see how such a pairing leads to problems in a relationship. One person tries to escalate conflict while the other person tries to check out… and no one is happy with the outcome.

Source: Feeney, J. A., & Karantzas, G. C. (2017). Couple conflict: insights from an attachment perspective. Current Opinion in Psychology, 13, 60-64.