Nobody sees the world exactly the same way. When you are in a relationship, what is considered appropriate behavior largely depends on your partner’s style of attachment (see, attachment styles).
Anxious individuals were much more upset when their partners engaged in the behaviors listed below. Dismissing individuals were much less concerned when their partners acted the same way.
Behaviors more likely to bother an anxious, but not a dismissing partner:
- Emailing pictures of themselves naked
- Texting erotic messages to someone else
- Watching a pornographic movie together
- Sleeping in the same bed
- Holding hands
- Staying in the same hotel room
- Spending lots of time together
- Accompanying to a formal event
- Going out to dinner
- Talking on the phone several times a week
- Kissing on the cheek
- Sharing secrets
- Hugging for more than 10 seconds
- Calling when upset about their relationship partner
- Taking a road trip out of the state
- Telling dirty jokes
What counts as cheating really depends on who you date. Anxious individuals give their partners much less leeway than dismissing individuals. All the more reason to understand how attachment styles influence what happens in a romantic relationship.
The entire study can be found here.