Truth About Deception

The only "successful" relationships I seem able to have are with married men. I have never married, I am not interested in having children. I have a very demanding job which involves long and unusual hours, some traveling, a lot of flexibility. Most of the men I meet are married, many of them don't seem to mind having outside "relationships". This would be fine only several times and several of the wives have found out. One in particular recently has been have been very very vindictive and I was afraid of losing my job, I was that uncertain of what she might do. I honestly do not understand why these women are so angry. I don't want to marry their husbands. I enjoy their company. Why is that so "bad"?

A year ago, I found out my boyfriend had cheated on me. I did my best to forgive and forget but it was impossible. I ended up sleeping with his best friend at the time, who had become my personal confidant about my boyfriend and my issues in our relationship. It was a one time thing but me and our friend have continued to talk ever since. While I do love my boyfriend for everything that he is, this other man is everything and so much more and I have found myself completely in love with him now. I don't know what to do as he is married to someone else and I live with my boyfriend. While I know he is still attracted to me, both physically and mentally, I don't know if he has the same feelings for me that I have for him, so I live in silence for fear of ruining what is a wonderful friendship.

I can't stop thinking about sleeping with my boss. We have never actually done anything or even come close, but every time I am in the same room as him I just want to jump him. I think about him when he isn't around and wonder what it would be like to even just share a kiss. I have no idea if he feels the same way, but can't help but feel that there has to be some sort of attraction on his end because of the way we look at each other. But then I start thinking that I may be making all this up in my head and he just views me as a professional. He is 43 and never been married and has that little bit of flirtation to him... I am 25 and have a boyfriend who I love very much. I even feel bad about the way I think about my boss which makes me think I definitely shouldn't act on it, because I will feel horrible. I have never cheated and never even thought about it seriously until now obviously. I just wanted to put this out there because I feel so wrong liking him this way, but just cant help wanting to be kinda bad!

I cheated on my husband. About a week ago, I went to a party while my husband stayed at home with our kids. I had way to much to drink, and I slept with someone else. I don't know what to say to him, and I'm overridden with guilt. We've been married for almost 7 years, and he is the most wonderful man in the world. I want to be honest with him because I have always trusted him as he has always trusted me, but I'm afraid that he will leave me if I come clean. I hate myself for hurting him. I hate myself for not telling him that I hurt him. I hate myself for breaking the trust between us and our family. I can't believe I did this to him and to our kids. I don't ever want to lose him, our kids, or the wonderful life that we have created together. I love him.