Comments for Girlfriend is Snooping at http://www.truthaboutdeception.com , comment 1 to 16 out of 16 comments http://www.truthaboutdeception.com Thu, 20 Nov 2008 04:20:56 +0100 FeedCreator 1.7.2 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1559 I snoop sometimes. And I know exactly why I do it. My husbands lies about a range of different things. I can't believe anything he says anymore. I have pleaded with him to stop lying to me, that I would rather know the truth but that hasn't helped at all. I give him so many chances to tell the truth when i know he has lied, but he never pulls through for me. I am completely depressed with major anxiety issues and never being able to trust my husband and best friend is making it worse. - guest628 Thu, 14 Aug 2008 10:32:44 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1531 comment to goofie23... you know why I snoop.... you have flirted online with girls email, messenger even with web cam.... and sending dirty pics to girls with your phone!!! now tell me I'm paranoid, you made me this way! try telling people what you did before bad mouthing me!!! look at your own mistakes, you nearly lost me and i have given you so many chances and i'm still around, not many girls would be. - TH Tue, 05 Aug 2008 13:01:07 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1449 I started snooping because I had a rotten relationship in the past. My bf found out and understood. he told me to keep doing it if it made me feel better. I felt so guilty that I stopped. And then about two years ago, we started talking about proposals. All the sudden the snoop virus hit me again. I just needed to know if he was really planning stuff. If he was getting what we talked about. If he was being ripped off. It wasn't really about trust... it was about control. I don't like not being in control of things. checking his email gave me a sense of control. but what happened in the end I will never forgive myself for. I found an email with the ring in it. My heart was completely broken when I realized that I did get what I want and I ruined my surprise. Now I feel awful. I feel like a terrible person and wish I could take it back. I can't tell my boyfriend what I've done because he deserves to feel happy. I guess what I'm getting at is that perhaps your g/f does trust you and that maybe the snooping is part of a bigger issue. If it's about trust work with her. If it's about control, talk to her and tell her that she needs counseling. Tell her that it hurts you that you don't have any privacy and that you're worried that one day it might ruin a surprise. If she loves you she'll work on it. I know I will. - Guilty as charged Wed, 25 Jun 2008 18:37:03 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1448 My girlfriends that paranoid, she snoops, reads my emails, checks my phones pisses the hell out of me to the extent I hate every bloody day of my life, destroys my personality, can't look at anyone, can't even make a joke in case she thinks into it. If I didn't love her I wouldn't even be here cuz I'm tired of trying to help her!! And she wants to get married, wtf is the point when there's no trust.. I hate my life cuz of her, all she does 24/7 is worry, worry, worry... - goofie23 Wed, 25 Jun 2008 13:39:36 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1324 Uh if I never snooped I would still be with my husband who told his baby-mama I was his lawyer; conned my friend out of $2,000 and invested it in a cash scheme and lost it; had a girlfriend on the side; lied about felony convictions; etc etc.... before you marry someone it is okay to do a credit check, criminal background check, email account etc -- find out what you are getting into before you take that plunge!! My dad doesn't care if my mom looks at his email cuz he's not doing anything and they've been married 41 years... he's only worried that she might delete something important by accident -- bottom line if you aren't hiding anything your wife should be able to answer your phone if it rings or peek at your email -- if it is boring or proper she will be bored and leave it alone -- BUT I draw the line at reading confidential work product or DIARIES should be off limits cuz that's the person's personal space and self-conversations AMEN. - lol Tue, 22 Apr 2008 03:44:50 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1310 My g/f has broken into my email account and really found nothing apart from that I didn't tell her everything because it was just stuff. Don't do it you find more out about yourself when you do this kind of thing! If you don't trust then why? - jesus knows Thu, 17 Apr 2008 10:35:57 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1252 Sad, my ex gf snooped on me. I knew she did because when I brought it up she had that guilty look on her face I know so well. It caused me a lot of anxiety. I think because I loved her so much and the breach of my privacy by her was completely devastating. I even started smoking again, which I knew she hated. Though I don't actually like smoking I continued because I wanted to start being honest. She just couldn't do it. Now we're broken up and I have to quit smoking again. The truly sad part is that I was completely hers, loyal to the t. I would have given my life for her and she threw it away because she couldn't be honest. Admission is the first step and the most important step to regaining someone's trust, believe me - I know this first hand. - davids72 Sun, 23 Mar 2008 00:30:31 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-1226 I did some snooping, and it broke my heart. That's why it's four in the morning and I'm still up reading websites about how/why to build trust. - sad Tue, 11 Mar 2008 05:00:27 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-873 I recently set up a bogus account to catch out my new b/f and it worked. He responded to the email, but later told me he knew it was me... I had no reason to doubt him, it was because I don't trust myself that I can't trust others... It's not fun and I don't want to be mistrusting anymore. - mistrusting Thu, 26 Jul 2007 14:20:42 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-818 I was married to a narcissist, who lied about everything, even when he didn't need to. Things just weren't adding up and I snooped to protect myself. What was at stake for me was what I had worked for all my life and my assets were fairly large. Fortunately, all of what I found out by snooping helped me make the decision to leave with my assets intact. If I had stayed, he only would have tried to go through everything I had and at the rate he was going I would have been broke in less than 5 years. If you have a gut feeling, go with it. If nothing is going on, they'll understand. If they're lying, cheating and stealing from you, of course they're going to be angry! Cuz you caught them! Hopefully, his new narcissist supply will catch on and do the same. She had lots to loose too. - Guest Tue, 26 Jun 2007 13:01:38 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-394 My advice to any man that has a snooping girlfriend/wife: She's probably got some secrets of her own. Most snoopers are huge hypocrites. I know because I’m a snooping hypocrite and so are several of my friends! I recently snooped through my boyfriend's cell phone and I found out that he's been deceiving me. I was furious and I confronted him. But, if he were to go through my cell phone, he’d discover that I ‘cloak’ my contacts. (Ex: saving a guy’s number under a girl’s name)!!! I’m not cheating (yet) but it gives me some type of unhealthy satisfaction to know that he’s been just as dishonest as me. So, until I’m ready to let go of my “distractions,” I’m going to keep snooping ‘til we either break up or learn to trust each other. Good luck in your relationship! - Guest Tue, 26 Dec 2006 18:05:36 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-180 I snooped on my husband who absolutely had nothing to hide, but insecurity fueled the snooping. Men don't have to give a reason for women to do anything. We do it because we choose to (in situations where no reason were given) b/c of this I have had to restore my relationship because he lost trust for me and it is a terrible feeling for someone not to trust you over nothing or paranoia.. IT'S NOT WORTH IT!! - Guest Tue, 19 Sep 2006 21:08:32 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-85 I have the notion my live in girlfriend is fooling around, and I snoop like crazy. I admit I don't quite know how I would react if I did in fact catch her, but I would rather know the truth than be living a total lie. I plan to continue snooping until July at which time I will give up. Oh well, best of luck to you all!~ - Guest Thu, 25 May 2006 10:41:18 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-73 I'd find it comical and jokingly encourage her to dig deeper... and laugh when she finds nothing, that is of course if you truly do not have a thing to hide. I agree with first guest - you must have caused some doubt for her to act in this way. - Guest Sun, 21 May 2006 13:10:06 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-67 My girlfriend snoops on my phone all the time, reads my diary to check appointments and query numbers on my cell that have no names. It's a nightmare, and then of course when I confront her she gets mad that I accuse her of snooping and tells me I'm crazy! I'm planning on dumping her. - Guest Fri, 21 Apr 2006 10:04:27 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/snooping/girlfriend_is_snooping.html#comment-54 I say, you probably have given your girlfriend a reason. No one does that unless their is some clear reason for her to do so. - j4william Tue, 21 Mar 2006 15:12:19 +0100