Comments for leave_cheating_husband at http://www.truthaboutdeception.com , comment 1 to 7 out of 7 comments http://www.truthaboutdeception.com Thu, 20 Nov 2008 04:35:17 +0100 FeedCreator 1.7.2 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1833 I feel like I'm going crazy racking my brain over how he could do this to me. I can't eat, sleep, stay focused it's all I think about I keep trying to just get through the holidays but everything has come unraveled. No matter who has confessed he will not and that is what makes me more mad than anything else. I have 4 kids and I work and go to school full time while he is injured and supposedly can't work but he can figure out a way to cheat on me. I know I'm leaving i just need to get this all figured out so my kids and i have a safe place to go. I have a little family and hate to put the burden on them. - Dianna Mon, 17 Nov 2008 14:01:38 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1474 If you guys choose to stay with a cheating spouse, you don't really have the right to complain. It's your choice. But if you do plan to do leave, focus more time on yourself. Get yourself ready financially and distance yourself from your spouse. At the end of it, you'll be free. - Jenelle Thu, 10 Jul 2008 22:51:04 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1437 I found out a few months ago that my husband was meeting women online and he was calling a few of them. There was one girl that he called nonstop and texted non stop. They called each other all the time and ran up the cell phone bill to over $400.00 in a matter of a couple weeks. He says they never met, she says they did. I confronted her she told me everything and my husband still lied until a few weeks ago. he told me almost everything. He was trying to pick up girls off the internet and he just wanted to dirt them and use them for sex he told me. Sick is what he is. I was devastated. We've been married for 14 years and together for 20. I'm trying to trust him but I can't. It's not an easy thing to do. we have a long way to go. He said he doesn't talk to anyone any more and that he made a huge mistake. Should I believe him? Only time will tell. - littlelise Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:06:16 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1291 Cloudy 123, it won't be easy for your husband to just break off with this other woman, especially if him going with her in the first place is about him re-thinking his life. From my experience, there isn't much we can do to change the behavior of others, so its pointless trying to. Now that you know that he has slept with someone else, you can ask yourself what you want to do about it. Don't do it just yet, because you are now in shock and confused, but give yourself time, be patient with yourself. Just like I said in my first message to you, invest in yourself and you will see that with time you will make the right decision. If your husband wants to behave the way he does, thats his problem. Yes, it hurts and I know how much very well, believe me, but at the end of the day, I could have gone on following my husband, worry about his every move, but I decided not to. I stay in the marriage for now because it suits me to and I have invested a lot of years here. If I was younger, and this message is for Isabelle I would not waste the rest of my life on someone who is immature and doesn't know what he wants in life, but I am not young any more and I have to think of my welfare first and foremost. I tell you this though, since I started to invest in myself and by showing my husband a more confident and attractive woman, he is paying me a lot more attention, in return, I have started to see him in a different light and see the man first rather than the husband. I have stopped being overly familiar with him and talk to him as if he was a prospective lover. I don't share petty worries with him anymore and I certainly don't nag him either. You know something? Life is much easier this way. Try it and you will see how much better you will feel. If nothing else, you will get to know a new you. If in the end if he does go off, then at least you will be much stronger to deal with it and get on with your life. - ang_ei12 Tue, 08 Apr 2008 03:19:53 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1280 He has now confessed to sleeping with her, he told me this 3 weeks ago and of course I was devastated. We are trying to work things out, but I still think he's seeing/talking to her. I check his phone and he's still deleting the calls. I suggested marriage counseling and he doesn't want to go, he said everything is fine and he said he's past it and doesn't want to talk about it. What do I do now? - cloudy123 Fri, 04 Apr 2008 10:18:40 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1275 My husband is in the military. We were both in the Navy before and have been together for 4 yrs. He joined the Army after getting out for a year. We were fine when he left 3 mos. ago but now he found new friends to hang out with that are in their early 20s he's 28 yrs old. He feels that he gets tempted every time they go out on clubs and would only go first base. He said I'm his only home run. I think that's very childish of him to say. I love him despite this but he thinks he missed out on those things before and that he enjoys his new life. He still calls and says that he loves me. He doesn't want to go on leave because he is still holding grudges on the past when we had petty fights. He is going to be stationed in Korea after training in June. Last time we saw each other is 3 mos. ago. I offered to see him during spring break bec. I'm in nursing school. He said he doesn't know if he has that time and not to waste my money in flying but stated that I could come over for his graduation for 4 days. I don't know what to do in this situation. Every time he calls it's all about him and he never bothers to ask how am I doing. I think he likes the attention from women. - isabelle Thu, 03 Apr 2008 11:22:09 +0100 http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/ask_an_expert/infidelity/leave%11cheating%11husband.html#comment-1262 I don't know whether I am right saying this, but it seems to me that at different stages in their lives, men want different things than women do,and, if a couple can work through a difficult stage then it can only help their relationship become stronger for the next stage. You have invested 16 years in this relationship and to throw them away without putting up a fight would be a real shame. What you have to do is to invest in yourself first and foremost, just like he does. I don't mean that you should cheat as two wrongs don't make a right, what I mean is that you should do things which please you and improve you. When he sees this, it will certainly make him stand up and take notice, believe me. Start by being more assertive, don't share your concerns with him for a while, be a little more mysterious, arrange outings for the two of you, pay him some positive attention too, but think back to the days when you first met and try to recapture that feeling. If after having tried this for say a year and he still acts like a d..khead, then you might well have to re-think your future with him. One consolation, you are still young and if you want to can find a person who suits you better. Good luck! - ang_ei12 Fri, 28 Mar 2008 04:03:25 +0100