My wife is a pathilogical liar and a cheat. She has been cheating on me for at least 7 years. She tells me she wants me to forgive her. My response is I will get past it when it stops happening. My big question is should I tell her mother that her daughter has been lying to her for her entire life. A lot of the time it is made up stories about me. Outragous stories that never happened and make me look like an ass. Other stories that will make her mother look like a fool for beliving them. I can't deal with the opinion her parents have of me when it is based on total lies and fabrication. The problem with telling her mother is would she believe me anymore.(At on time she would have) Would it change anything or just open a big can of worms. Her mother likes to deal with adversity with denial. It is important to me that she knows the truth but it would cause many more problems with our marriage. Should I try to let it go or confront it?

Hello. Your situation is unfortunate. I would first deal more with your wife, before her mother. I would make her aware that her lying and cheating on you are destructive and if she wants to save your relationship, she needs to accept that she needs to change this behavior. Never say "you need to change", say "your behavior needs to change". Make sure she knows exactly how her behavior makes you feel. So, this needs to be a calm, planned conversation. You need to request of her that you get to talk without her interrupting or getting defensive. After you are specific about her undesired behavior and the affect it had on you, then ask her if she would like you to do those things to her. Maybe this will give her some perspective. She needs counseling, and once she starts counseling, you can bring up that she needs to correct the false image she created of you to her parents. The counselor can help you deal with that. Give her a specific choice, if this happens again, I will have to make life better for myself. Telling her mother on your own at this point will be quite destructive. Good luck

It would do you no good to tell her mother what has been going on. more than likely your wife developed this behavior when she was a child. her mother knows what she does but like you said she is in denial. also no matter how long you have been married and part of the family, you are still the outsider and this type of information would not be well received.

Your right I did tell her mom and it did make matters worse. Her mom knows the truth but refuses to accept it. My wife found out I told her and has threaten to call the cops on me. She says she will tell them I assulted her like some of her friends have done. I have never touched her and never would but I know they would beleive her. She is a very good lier!! I should have listened.

I sympathise with your situation as I went through almost the identical thing. As you have found out, going to her mother, who already knew would just make matters worse. My (just recently) ex-wife threatened the same things. These people are sadly ill and cannot be cured. Counselling may lessen the lying and the destructive nature of it my ultimately it will not change. Only in adolescence can this illness be cured. A child learns that there are consequences to their actions, so are able to learn the lessons. As an adult they do not have to take responsibility for our actions (or so they believe), as they are old enough to make any decision without being under the 'control' of a parents teaching. These people are also very charming, but because they have chosen to be. In order to have their lies believed, they need to play the mind game with everyone. Consider this, imagine if you were constantly lying all day long, you would need to be very astute and clever to keep it up and not get caught. The lies are very cleverly thought up and are hard to disprove. You will have to accept her lying and go through the rest of your life simple knowing that she is always lying to you. Don't make decisions on anything she tells you. This way you can survive your marriage. If you cannot accept this fate then you will have to get out. I do not ever advocate divorce, but whom did you really marry anyway? Good Luck...