I have a close friend who "thinks" her husband is cheating. I know he is and have told her so. (ran into them on a few occassions) I have even offered to take photos and get proof if she needs it. She is in denial...She says she loves him and he is her soulmate etc...and they will work things out. They have a 3 year old together.

Whenever she confronts him though, he uses one of the many "cheater's paradox" responses...which is not surprising. She believes him and then says everything will be okay.

But he has been seeing the same woman for almost 2 years!!! It seems to be so much more than physical. I am worried that she will continue on and someday realize she has lost years of her life in an imaginary relationship with him.

She aked me why he does not divorce her if he does not want to be with her and the response I give is that it is easier for him to deny and stay married. That way, he does not have financial issues and he is not perceived as the "bad guy" for breaking up their marriage. I have told her that she needs to be strong and move on...obviously after years of this, even if he might still care about her, he cannot be in love with her, and even if he says he is, he is showing her an amount of disrespect (her and their child), that NO ONE should stand for.

I am looking for responses from other women who have left and it was for the better, men too I want to show her that although it takes courage to leave a "safe" place, it can lead to a better and more loving life..

I DO realize that once in a while a cheater is sorry and comes clean, but that always seems to be when they "find religion"...there is no chance of this guy ever finding religion!