I dont know if she is still seeing the guy or what, I just dont trust her, she has been going through my cell and calling people, trying to find something on me.
Almost like she did with her first husband, she has a covert background so this whole thing has been a game to her almost, or so it seems.
I plan to just go ahead and move on, get myself straight and feel, deal and heal.
Your right, it really doent matter what the parents think of me, I know in my heart whats been going on, I canhear ot with my own two ears, and I want to have peace.
What I dont understand is howshe can treat me so kind and loving, caring and thoughtful on an almost daily level its uncanny and yet be so dark and perverted on the other
Well the place is ready for me, I am going to start moving my things in as soon as possible

Update
I just told her that I plan to move out, and it got very disturbing, she became very upset, cried and cried, proclaimed her innocense, told me how much she loved me and that I should beleive her, that the evidence I have is circumstanstial and not concrete, that she needs me..
Told me that I dont know how much she loves and needs me and how much she has sacrificed for me..
That many people can vouch for her charector, that she stayed single for eight years and didnt want her 2nd marriage to end on a lie for something that she didnt do, then she said something like "I didnt want to hurt you" and she changed it to "I dont want to hurt you"..

I felt bad, and reached out to her, held her and told her I love her too...
But I still have the doubts in my heart, and I know what I know.
Does it have to be this hard ?

I listened for months to the audio, whispers and noises, shredded it death, listened intently to everything, most noises dont come out at first,but are low,I thought maybe I'm hearingthings, maybe I want to believe that she is having an affair and making this up, like she says, then I listen again, and its clear to me, to me...

I'm sorry to rant and rave, this is my life and my marriage and I want to make a proper decision on my own.
Seeing as so many of you have been down this road before me, if I tell you whats happening you can offer your experience and what you had to do ...
Thank You so much

You know what you have heard on those tapes. Its really hard for her to come up with an explanitaion for the noises that are on those tapes. Of course she is going to say that it isnt true, that you are hearing things. And that is what is going to cause you to doubt yourself, DONT! You need to do what is right for you, if that means moving out then do it. Maybe all you need is a trial seperation to see how things go, let her stew in her misery. She has created this for the two of you and you need to make sure that she is what you want. If she really believes that you are going to leave her then maybe she will stop seeing that other guy. I would leave the audio in the house even after you move out. Come back every now and then to check it and see if she is still seeing him. If she is then you know that she wont change no matter what you do. I wish the best for you and thanks for keeping us updated.

Hi Group
this place has been my solice, truly I am grateful to you all.....I will indeed keep moving forward with this.
My wife will not own up to it, she's intent on maintaining an image of a good wife, your right though, I was starting to doubt myself and my proof, its like when we speak she is waiting for something more concrete than what I have and is confident in herself that I dont have anything
Shame, the deception is so deep I can feel it, well I'm supposed to move in a oouple of weeks so I will keep you updated as to my progress...
Thank You

Ajneman, I love you so much...I did not have an affair on you...don't want to and never will. I don't know why it is hard for you to believe this.

You recorded me for 30 days or more video and all, went through my mail and email and found nothing. It is like you are looking for something from the start. All you have is sounds of everyday movements in the house. The house can not be quiet when you are out...other people live there, we have visitors and pets.

I am so hurt we can not get beyond this. We took a trip a 2 weeks ago and had a great time and come to find out when we get home you have signed a lease to move. I wish you would of told me. Ajnevman, I love you and treat you like a king. If I was having an affair I would not do that. I have been single for 8 years before we met. I can count up to 2 men I have been with before you. It is not my character to do that. I just think when we met, that was something that was always there in you thinking that you are always being done wrong and it came out with me.

Not to say 2 month ago you want to have an affair with a co-worker, but we squashed it and I have not hung that over you. I am a forgiving person. But you got this imaginary affair that I have not done, and it beating me over the head with it for 7 months. We talk all the time about this and you know and you say in your heart that I did not have an affair. Everyone tells you about me. You know where I am at everyday and hour. I just don't know how this became so confused and messed up.

I am your wife and I never had an affair, I have been hurting for the pass 7 months on this... I love you so much I put up with it. People are accused of something like this everyday. Everybody that is accused are not having an affair.

Ajnevman, I love you, and I wish we can mend our marriage back together. We have not been married long and is going on our 1 year anniversary. I love you and all the things you do. ajnevman...I did not have an affair on you. I don't know how many times I must say it. I show you everyday.

love ya.

This is so sad. It breaks my heart to hear your pain with this situation. It's not like you are spying because you enjoy it! That's obvious to me....but it's hard to let go isn't it? I'm new to the forum and have just gone through finding out my husband of 15 years cheated on me this September through November. We are going through counseling...he had a major porn addiction as well. But the pain......oh, the pain is mind-boggling. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy....well, except maybe the bimbo who cheated with him. I hope you either get your partner to accept her problem and stop hurting herself and you with the infidelity. Or I hope that you can find it in yourself to go your separate way and have peace about this whole thing. Hang in there....you're not alone.