I just caught my wife cheating on me.
She went to work for an open house and called saying she was going out after to have a few drinks. When she arrive at home at 2:45 AM she was drunk and her hair was real messy. I asked her who she had been sleeping with and she replyed nobody. I followed her to the closet and continued the discussion while she changed for bed. When she took her skirt off I noticed she had no pantys on and asked where they were. After several excuses she crawled into bed with a tear in her eye and just starred at me not saying anything. The next morning she claimed she didnt remember what happened that night but she did not have sex as she would know. 6 days later and several phone calls to her co-workers later she admitted that something happened but could not remember what happened. My wife does not drink alot but when she does she tends to get wild and drink until she blacks out or throws up (does not know her limits). The twist is her boss (male) and other co-workers (female) were with her. All of the female co-workers except one left ealier and my wife, her male boss, another guy and another female coworkers were left later. My wife suspected it might be the other guy until further discussion. She and I wondered if it might be her boss and have discussed it. I called her boss and talked to him about what had happened and he claims he does not now. When I asked him for the entry and exit logs for the building (that is were everyone left their vehicles prior to going out) he got defensive and said he could not believe I did not belive him. I told him I wanted them and when I received them I was told that the entry and exit logs only show a weeks worth of data. I also called the other guy and he said that he and my wife were the the last to leave the parking lot but nothing had happened. When I told him that the people my wife worked with thought his was involved he said it sounds like they were making him the fall guy. 3 weeks later my boss tells my wife that he talked to the other guy and that the other guy said they had sex in the parking lot and that my wife was ready to party. My wife has talked with me and says it was a mistake and that she just wants me to drop it at this point. she does not want to disturb work anymore or cause anymore immberasment. My wife truly loves her job and would hate to loose it. I feel she does not want to choose between me and the job so she wants to just move on. We have been married for 16 years and have two children. One day I belive her and the next I think she is lying. I want to find the real truth and she wants to move on. Any suggestions

I think that since your wife was at least open, and let you know that something may have happened, then you should give her the benifit of the doubt.....that doesn't mean that I think that she should get away with using being drunk as an excuse for doing things like that at all!!!!!

I think you should sit her down, and talk to her about getting into situations where she could be potentially be out of control, and find a way around it happening. You could always suggest going with her, or asking her to go with a trusted friend.

If she doesn't know her alcohol limits, then, another suggestion would be to try and work out what they are, and the signs that she has had enough, cos then she would know when to stop, or at least slow down.

I think your wife is very brave to have told you in the first place, and have a lot of trust, and confidence in you. You should think of yourself as very lucky, because I don't think I could have been so open if I had realised that I had done something like that.

I think given that she created this problem due to her carelessness, she should sacrifice her job and find another one if she wants to save your marriage. People make mistakes, but they have to feel regret for them and make it up to you if they're sincere.

I wish it was that easy for someone to just move on From job or deception it not. If you love your wife as much as you say and she has shown real remorse for her actions then eventually you should be able to forgive her. It won't be easy and it takes a long time but if you both want it to work you can make it. You could put to her that she should consider changing jobs for her and your sanity as the group of people she may thinks are friends and collegues obviously didn't give a stuff what happened that night. For gods sake for all they know your wife could have been date raped by this guy, do we really know the people we work with that well and do they really care what happens to us(NO). I do recommend that you go to couples counselling either privately or through your church if you belong to one. It does help clarify what has happened and can give you and your wife the tools to work through this. I do hope you can stay together as too many marriages are given up on too quickly. My H had affair and still sees o/w at work and yes it's hard for both myself and him(don't care what she feels). He not sure what he wants yet(says He has feelings for her)so i'm currently in limbo land as I still love him very much and I want him with me and children and yes we are having counselling which I think is showing him that we can be together if he wants(as said decision not in my hands at the moment) but enough bout me I wish you both all the best of Luck please look after you as you do matter and God bless you both Kat007 xx(uk)

I think that regardless if she leaves her job, who is to say it wont happen with the next job. I truly believe oncee a cheater always a cheater, and if you lie, you cheat. I only speak from experience. My boyfriend cheated with a woman he worked with and the girl called me on my cell phone wanting to know what relationship i was to him. He later failed a voluteer lie detector test and fialed it with flying colors. we was found deception on every question. It was more to it than that but i say leave her!!!!

Once a cheater, Always a cheater that is a known fact. dont butter it up, my closest friend is a player and she tells me the inside scoop and tells me she lies and cheats and with the history of my past relationships that is a known fact. Nothing will change a person from cheating if the cheat once the will cheat again and again.